Today my sister called to talk about the issues she’s having with her job. Apparently, she is being passed over for several promotions, and she’s calling BS when her supervisor claims that he has “bigger things” in store for her. He told her this in January, and she’s still waiting for her promotion. She’s frustrated and kind of depressed, and I’m touched that she called me to talk about it. We talk every 2-3 weeks. When I first graduated we emailed quite a bit at work, but around the holidays it dwindled. Lately we just phone.  

 So we talked for about 25 minutes, and I counseled her about how she should sit down and talk with her supervisor to see what her real opportunities are with the company. In my opinion, dialogue between her and her supervisor is key–instead of just keeping her ideas and goals inside and waiting for something to happen, she needs to find out what she CAN do to move ahead. I suggested she show them how vested she is in the company, and share with them her ideas for growth. She has such great potential, and although she lacks confidence, she still should communicate to them her desire to advance. They need to know that she’s serious. I wanted her to have the confidence to move forward and open the lines of communication with her employer.

I was just about to tell her that I would call her later because I had made it to work when she asked, “Do you like your job?

It was like she opened my chest and ripped out my guts. WTF? Am I really that invisible? How does she not remember the conversations I’ve had with her about my job, and about how I’m quitting and teaching in the fall?

It hurts. Just like when my Mother asked me, “What’s your last name again?” after I’d been married for two years.


7 responses to “family

  1. I am sorry this happened to you; I understand how you feel. It seems that the people closest to us hurt us the most.


  2. incessanthunger

    I just don’t understand how I can be so invisible to people I am SUPPOSED to be close to, you know. My in-laws know me better than my own family.

    It just boggles me. I feel strong today, though. I’m not going to let it get to me. I can’t change these people. I can only be me!

  3. incessanthunger

    I don’t know if I’m strong, but I’m feelin’ good today, and I’m determined to make today a good day!

    Thanks for your kind words and encouragement!

  4. Oh, that is so hurtful. I too would have felt crushed. I am really sorry 😦

  5. I’m sorry about what happened. Sometimes people are so wrapped up in their own lives that they don’t take time to notice those close to them. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you, she’d probably be disgusted with herself if she realised how much she’d hurt you. It’s ok to feel hurt, anybody would. I hope you feel better soon xx

  6. Ouch. Sorry such a positive experience turned into such a crummy one for you. Just remember your behaviour isn’t the one that should be questioned here… I’m a firm believer that consistent positive output will come back to us sooner or later. *hugs*

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